Friday, October 31, 2025

Oath of Noble Genies Paladin

 Two background notes:

Disney's Aladdin came out when I was six years old. I was already a fan of the story, which I think I had seen a version of at Boston's Children's Theater, or maybe on some television program. We also had some audio cassettes of Arabian Nights stories. But even with that background, I fell in love with that movie, and particularly Robin Williams' Genie. I love Genies as a fixture of fantasy.

Seemingly unrelated: while it's a common convention in D&D that Bards are the horniest class, among my friends, perhaps by coincidence, we've found that Paladins are, by far, the hornier characters. My own Aasimar Vengeance Paladin in our Curse of Strahd game was a traumatized disaster lesbian who dulled her pain with prostitutes (well, in her backstory. She had a hard time finding any in Barovia), and the two paladins in my Wildemount game have both been led by their libidos (one of who slept with the daughter of Ludinus Deleth).

Anyway, I mention the horny paladin trope because I think this subclass might lend itself well to chivalric horniness because it's one where you're encouraged to go unarmored.

While I tend to prefer heavy armor and heavy weapons for my melee character, the Noble Genie paladin is going to enable dual-wielding or using a rapier and shield. We'll see why soon:

Oath Spells:

Cantrip: Elementalism

1st: Chromatic Orb, Thunderous Smite

2nd: Mirror Image, Phantasmal Force

3rd: Fly, Gaseous Form

4th: Conjure Minor Elementals, Summon Elemental

5th: Banishing Smite, Contact Other Plane

    Some solid damage spells here. Chromatic Orb is quite good, though better when you're focused on your spellcasting stat and can upcast it by a lot. Mirror Image is now great for a character with a high AC. And of course, despite the nerf, Conjure Minor Elementals is fantastic - though again, it gets a lot of power out of upcasting, which we won't be able to do at all until level 17 (unless we start multiclassing into Bard or Sorcerer).

Level 3:

Elemental Smite:

When you cast Divine Smite, you can expend a Channel Divinity to add one additional effect from the following options:

Dao's Crush: Earth rises up to grapple the target of your divine smite. The target is grappled and restrained (escape DC is your spell save DC).

    So, I think because the grapple is coming from the earth, you don't need to stay within range of the target to maintain the grapple (and you don't need a free hand). That means a no-save restraint on a target as long as you hit them. That's quite good! And it's not even, like, they're restrained for a round - it lasts until they can break free.

Djinni's Escape: You teleport to an unoccupied space you can see within 30 feet and take on a semi-incorporeal form until the end of your next turn. While in this form, you have resistance to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage, and you are immune to being grappled, prone, or restrained.

    Almost the opposite of Dao's Crush, this is a very nice defensive move, or it can get you from one enemy to your next target and protect you a bit. A solid option.

Efreeti's Fury: The target of the divine smite takes an extra 2d4 fire damage, and the fire jumps to another creature within 30 feet of you that you can see, also taking 2d4 fire damage.

    This damage isn't nothing, but it's not huge either. I think this is the "not sure what else we need to do" option.

Marid's Surge: The target of your divine smite and each creature of your choice within a 10 foot emanation originating from you has to make a Strength save against your spell save DC. On a failure, a creature is pushed 15 feet directly away from you and is prone.

    Potentially good if you need to break up enemy lines, but more situational than the Dao or Djinni options.

    Overall, this is a very cool feature that you'll get a lot of use out of. Of course it is limited by both your spell slots and your Channel Divinity options, but this is a case where there are multiple very powerful options.

Genie's Splendor:

While you aren't wearing any armor (shields are ok) your AC is equal to 10 plus your Dex plus your Charisma. You also gain proficiency in your choice of Acrobatic, Intimidation, Performance, or Persuasion.

    This: this is why you can be the horny paladin. Ok, jokes aside: if you go for a Dex build, focusing on finesse weapons, you'll actually be able to have a quite good AC. If we assume you start off with +3s in both Dex and Charisma, that's already matching a suit of Chain Mail. If you can cap both, that's a 20 AC, which is as good as plate with a shield - and then you can get up to 22 with a shield (though I'd probably be tempted to dual-wield). Even if you don't manage to get Charisma past +3, maybe trying to fill it with general feats, you'll still get the equivalent of plate armor once you cap Dexterity.

    Now, you can forgo this entirely - nothing is stopping you from going the standard Strength-based route (also, if you want to multiclass, such as to go Genie patron Warlock, you'll need at least 13 Strength). But the option there is for you to be a paladin who fights in fine silks rather than steel. I really imagine mine having an open-chested, flowing silk shirt as he spins across the battlefield with scimitars and shortswords.

Level 7:

Aura of Elemental Shielding:

Choose Acid, Cold, Fire, Lightning, or Thunder: you and allies within your Aura of Protection gain resistance to that damage type. At the start of each of your turns, you can change the damage type to another one of these options (no action required).

    The fact that you can change this on a turn-by-turn basis is incredible. These are all reasonably common damage types, but if you had to change them on a rest or something, it'd require anticipating what kind of monsters you're going to face. Here, though, you can react quickly to the scenario. Oh, did a black dragon pop out of that marsh? Let's get acid resistance running!

    Also of note, this will help a lot in traversing areas of extreme heat or cold, as you can protect allies from exhaustion by giving them the appropriate resistance. You'll still need something like a Leomund's Tiny hut for when you sleep for the night, but it's good stuff.

Level 15:

Elemental Rebuke:

When you're hit with an attack, you can use a reaction to halve the damage against yourself (rounded down) and force the attacker to make a Dex save against your spell save DC. On a failure, the target takes 2d10+Cha of your choice of Acid, Cold, Fire, Lightning, or Thunder damage, or half as much on a success. You can do this Cha times per long rest (minimum 1).

    This is ok. The damage is decent, though not enormous at this level. It's a solid feature, but not as exciting as the other stuff.

Level 20:

Noble Scion:

As a bonus action, you gain the following benefits for 10 minutes or until you end the effect (no action required). You can do this once per long rest, or regain a use by expending a 5th level spell slot (standard 2024 Paladin ult stuff).

The benefits are that you get a fly speed of 60 feet and can hover, and when you or an ally within your aura of protection fails a d20 test, you can use a reaction to make them succeed instead.

    The flight is fine, though not as impressive at level 20. The automatic success on any d20 test, though, is quite good - the most obvious would be ensuring that an ally succeeds on a crucial saving throw, like avoiding being swallowed by the Tarrasque or sucked in by a Blob of Annihilation. But it could also potentially be powerful when you need some high-stakes ability check to succeed. Say you're binding some evil lich god with an anchor that will pull it out of the mortal plane (when has that ever happened before?) and you need to make a high-DC check to ensure that the anchor is properly attached to them? This guy can ensure that works!

Overall Thoughts:

I really like this subclass. I think in terms of flavor, it's a bit of a stretch, sure - the oath does have tenets, but it feels much more like you're going to be the champion or herald of a noble genie. But that's fine. I really like it.

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